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Quality in life
You do not know what quality is until you have it. Quality is a feeling, an experience that is individual and difficult to describe. Quality is also a buzzword in the service sector, and in product manufacturing where it refers to the intrinsic value of a material product, a business, a cultural work, or a person or a group. It is often assumed that quality can be measured, preferably in relation to a predetermined goal. Quality becomes a measure of goal fulfillment. But, how can you set a goal for quality when you do not know what it is until you have it, and if it is an individual experience,…
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A Sunday adventure
Sometimes it’s wonderful to just enjoy the experience and the nice company. Not to think too much, not to solve all kinds of world problems, or to be intelligent and funny. Sunday was such a day.
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More blossoming love!
This post contains no deep thoughts! I don’t have a lavish garden but my little townhouse lot with its small flowerbed was so beautiful tonight when I got home. My chest was filled with love like little bumblebees buzzing in there. I got the urge to take some macro pictures. With compliments to Ernst Kirchsteiger!
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Flourishing love.
When I browse my own Instagram site, I see many pictures of flowers. There are also quite a lot of flowers here in my blog. I appreciate flowers, I love flowers! Now it is spring and there are more and more flowers everywhere. Spring brings out all the beautiful flowers! Flowers are created by nature. It is true that what is created by nature is beautiful. Humans are also created by nature! Spring also brings out the beauty in people. This year’s spring has been cold. Finally, the heat came and my camera had to follow me on the weekend’s walks. I saw spring flowers and my beautiful love.
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Fear and Love
We all carry inner fears. I think that when we recognize them and know them, we have the conditions necessary to reach the final stage of our ”adult development”. In our minds we have an idea of who we are. We have learned the idea of ourselves during life. Thoughts about ourselves have been shaped by success and adversity. We have learned to live our lives. But even if the thoughts, once formed, were appropriate, in adulthood they may have become an inner fear, a fear that complicates life. We are happy to defend our inner fear of discovery. Wouldn’t it be awful if someone discovered that we are inadequate…
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Communicating love
Whenever we want to communicate, we are usually anxious to be understood and to understand. Why do we overlook this when we try to communicate love? Is inner fear hindering us, or are there simply different languages of love? Do we talk past each other because we have different languages? Do you think your partner doesn’t understand you? Do you know what you need to understand love expressions? Have you thought about what makes your partner feel love? How do you communicate love with each other? I like manuals of living! They make me think and sometimes I learn. I stumbled across a book by Gary Chapman that describes a…
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Love and trust.
Trust is the foundation of love, and we can only truly love someone that we can trust. Love by itself isn’t enough, and really does not conquer all. I now know that I have to trust the one I Love. To have a healthy love relationship, I must have the guts to believe in my partner. Trust is necessary. Trust is a feature of love. Trust enhances love. A real love relationship is built upon trust. If your partner tends to break your trust in any way, it simply isn’t true love. Building trust requires commitment, and trust must be maintained. Trust requires listening to and communicating both our desires…
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Doing Stockholm!
I am rarely down town, even though I live and work near Stockholm city. This Christmas and New Year I had a little longer leave. It has been a wonderful vacation! I even had the opportunity “to do the town”. Me and my lovely sweetheart had lunch at Medelhavsmuseet, the Museum of Mediterranean and Near Eastern Antiquities. In the museum you will find Bagdad cafe, a delicious restaurant and wine bar. Tables are nicely placed among exhibition booths. We wanted to celebrate the day with a drink! Unfortunately, the bar at Katarinahissen was closed, but the view of Riddarfjärden, Gamla stan and Stadsgården was beautiful. We went to the nice bar…
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Chance and love.
Very much happens by chance or at random. Admittedly, the right conditions need to prevail, but chance mostly has a big impact. Being lucky seems necessary! When it comes to love, I think we create the conditions ourselves. Brusquely expressed, I lost faith in love about six months ago. I was well on my way to become bitter and almost misogynous! But, I’m basically unhelpfully romantic and couldn’t stop believing that even for me, somewhere there was a great answered love. I just had to take it easy and stop hunting, but still be open to love! Suddenly and completely unexpectedly she was there. I fell in love and realized…
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Forget the modesty!
You can really wonder why I’m blogging and why I’ve started posting about my feelings on the internet. This website started out as a kind of photo blog just because I wanted to learn blogging. But, honestly, I actually find photo blogs without text pretty boring even if the pictures may be really nice. Not all pictures do tell more than a thousand words! To me, a blog isn’t like posting on Facebook or Instagram. I confess I’m posting there to get many likes! On this blog, however, I can see the viewer statistics and where you viewers reside but nothing more. If you are a WordPress user and likes…
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The language of love
There is saying “Treat others the way you want to be treated”. In love relations this seems safe and easy, and you will probably get what you want in return. But imagine if you act completely unaware of the other’s wishes. Then you might become too selfish, simply a jerk. No one wants to be like that, right? I’d rather say “Treat others the way they want to be treated”. I enjoy being responsive, loving and generous but risk being perceived as too soft and without my own will. Fortunately, that’s a risk I’m prepared to take, and it seems to pay off! I now know that there is a love for each of…
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Reciprocated love
Some say unrequited love is real love but I can’t disagree more. Some say the less reciprocation there is, the more desire we have! I do believe they are horribly wrong. I would argue, however, that love without response is like an important question without an answer. I have been in love when I haven’t had the same reciprocated emotion, and it hurts. Not a pleasant soul pain like a sliver of autumn depression, but a nagging and joy-killing. Love has now suddenly arisen in my life and I feel that she really cares. She seems to see the imperfect me perfect. The love is mutually answered. The pictures are…
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Falling in love or enamoured hope!
In the Swedish everyday language there are several words for love, kind of reflecting the different stages of the “love relation process”. The first stage, when we are falling in love, is called “förälskad” and may translate into English as “enamoured”, or “amorous”, or simply “in love with”. I am into research and maybe I theorise too much. Anyway, I mean that stage when it all feels great and we are full of hope and dreams. We hope that our lover will deliver on all the promises our earlier relationships failed to fulfil, and we dream of remaining in love forever. All our love hormones are overflowing. This truly is…
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Sustainable love
It is really not sustainable to give up the belief in love. I am absolutely convinced that love even can last a long time. The vast majority of my friends do live with love in long-term relationships. Yes, I know it may not always have been a dance on roses, but still, they stick together and seem to appreciate each other. Nowadays I feel completely convinced that there is a wonderful person also for me. A great and loving woman whom I appreciate and who can appreciate me. I am an incurable romantic and believe we can find a love that is genuine, in which I and she recognize each…
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Love and expectations.
I find love and expectations difficult and it doesn’t seem to get easier with age. I am a romantic and think that practical or comfortable love is boring, but what are realistic expectations? Does it mean I can forget a great love, forget that person who makes it feel like bumblebees are buzzing in my chest? Does having realistic expectations mean that I should settle for someone who is okay, and that I should be happy with a partner who isn’t great? Actually, I would generally be okay with a partner who is human, just like me, and who, like me, is imperfect. I don’t expect myself and my partner…
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Without love!
Love is not finding someone to live with, it’s finding the one you don’t want to live without! I tend to learn stepwise. Sudden insights make me understand. This quote on love made me realize that I have been chasing love the wrong way. I am divorced since long, and am ashamed of not succeeding in the marriage. In addition, since my divorce I have not been able to keep a lasting love relation. This adds to my guilt. But, before I didn’t have the understanding I got from the quote above. Some years ago I actually stumbled upon the kind of love that is hard to live without. I haven’t realized this before. Unfortunately, she…
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The second bloom!
It is wonderful in the early summer when the roses bloom, but the second flowering in late summer is also lovely. I myself have for a long time tried to bring about a second flowering in my own life. I know, you should be careful about whining and appearing unsuccessful in social media, but this is not Facebook, and I write what I want in my own blog! Depending on how you look at it, I know I actually have a very good life, but I do miss a love partner and that lack occupies too much of my thoughts and feelings. My youngest son tells me I think too…
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Trust and confidence
Trust and confidence are essential in close relations with love. Consider the many oddities we humans are devoted to in order to avoid closeness. Do you know the expression “alone is strong”? What a nonsense! Alone is afraid of intimacy. The other day I had the confidence to watch the marina. In the boat club we share the responsibility to watch each other’s boats. Together we become safer. We trust in each other. Compare this to a single boat in a small private dock. Independent, yes but insecure.
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In memory!
My father is dead. Considering how he lived his life, he grew old. Inheritance is important for longevity, but you probably also have to take care of yourself. As far as I know, it is a bit unclear what legacy I have. Grandfather drank too much and grandfather died in the Finnish Continuation War. My father also drank too much and probably did not grow as old as he could have been. But he had his life, and even though he drank away his family, he was my father. Without him I would not have existed. When he died, it turned out that he had left the church and left…
